The members of VORC (Vinton Off-Road Cyclists) invite everyone to come try out a fat bike on the miniature course they plan to set up outside the Vinton-Shellsburg Middle School (across the street from the Skate Center, where most of the Benton County Health Fair booths will be set up) from 8 a.m. to noon on Saturday, April 1. Bikes and helmets will be available so riders can learn what to expect if they try to ride the new trails VORC members and volunteers are creating in the hills near Riverside Park.

The trails include teeter-totters and narrow rails called “skinnies.”

The idea of a VORC riding a bike on a teeter-totter reminded us of a particular children’s author, so we decided to present this unique group in a unique way:

 

Imagine a place

Where you’ll see nothing odder

Than a VORC riding a bike

On a teeter-totter

It may sound like a scene

From a Seussified book

But my friends called the VORCs

Hope you will come take a look

Come look at their trails

Way up in the hills

Past Riverside Park

Where they promise big thrills

 

Just what is a VORC?

And what are the features

That you may observe on these

Two-wheeled, helmeted creatures?

 

VORCs can come in all colors and sizes

Both gents and ladies, girls and guys-es

Among them are workers of various ages

Entrepreneurs, sales-folk, poets and sages

The VORCS are creative-ish

Their ideas never stale

They are never contented

With a boring, plain trail

They meet once in a while

To put their helmets together

And through idea osmosis

Find a new way to share

Exciting new ways

That a fat bike can thrill ya

Although you may think

At the time it may kill ya

“Exciting and terrifying”

Is the mantra they shout

Tho’ it seems “death-defying”

To a rider with doubt

 

With this unique inspiration

The VORCS scheme and plan

To build stuff that can challenge

Any bike-pedaling fan

 

 

It’s been nigh 50 years

Since Evel Knievel

Taught the whole world

That riding on two wheels

Means more than riding

With both wheels on the dirt

And learning with danger

How to more safely flirt

 

It’s a different bike

This one man-powered version

Tho’ on She-VORCs, you know,

I cast no dispersion

Tho’ they won’t jump o’er busses

Or a casino’s big fountain

VORCs know what the fuss is

About biking on mountains

Or at least on the ridges

Along the Great Cedar

Riding among the trees

As a great uphill speeder

A VORC on a fat bike

Zooming over a “skinny”

Riding like Man ‘o War

But with nary a whinny –

 

It looks hard, you may surmise

And you know, I’d agree

But the VORC just replies:

“It looks easy to me”

 

The VORCS have a question

First posed by that Sam

You know the one:

The Great Sam-I-Am

“Would you, could you?

On two wheels?

Would you, could you?

Like, for reals?”

“Would you teeter over here

Or ride that skinny over there?

Do you like to ride on air

On a bike, without a care?”

 

The VORCs have some counsel

For the riders of bike

Those whose first response is:

“VORC, go take a hike”

 

Like that Cat in the hat

The VORC in the helmet

Knows just where’s its at

And how you can o’erwhelm it

 

And the VORCS invite you all in this way:

 

Though the sun may not shine

You can still come to play –

Both boys and girls

Of young and old ages

 

And if that hill seems too bigly

To take that first ride

The VORCS offer this deal:

They will help be your guide

Show up, then, in April

On the First Day (No foolin’)

And the VORCS will give you

A free moment of schoolin’

On what is a fat bike

And how you can ride it

And if you bring fear

They’ll teach you how to hide it

 

So…

 

Be your name Coulter or Birker or Schwan

Staab-Hesson-Phippen or Jacobs-Erick-son

Your fat bike is waiting

For you to get on