I admit it, I love politics.
Most of all I love the funny things that happen in politics.
Sometimes, there are things that are just glaringly funny.
For example, to kick off President’s Trump’s SOTUS speech last night, it was obvious that someone changed the seating. He said something about someone sitting next to Melania, but they were sitting next to Karen Pence.
Right away, I thought, “Well this is going to be a good one, they can’t even get that right.”
I have to admit, there was a lot of distraction when watching the speech.
For example, while watching I wanted to know what the purple ribbons were for.
I quit listening.
I googled it.
All I could find was that it was to represent domestic abuse. But I figured since President Trump hadn’t hit Melania, it had to be something else, and I was right. This morning the report is that it represented the Opiod crisis.
Then I noticed they had red buttons on too.
Again, I googled and didn’t find anything.
I still haven’t googled them today, I’m sure there’s something out there, but now that the speech is over, I’m off to other topics.
Last time everyone was wearing white.
This year black.
Next year zebra prints.
Then there was Nancy Pelosi.
Now, granted, when the camera is running for an hour, you might do something funny.
I mean EVERYONE remembers Ruth Bader Ginsburg falling asleep during President Obama’s speech, and I thought that was funny as well, but at the same time I wondered if she does that on the bench.
Last night the camera was on Nancy Pelosi.
I was fascinated. I don’t know if she had just grabbed a meal before the show or what, but it looked like the lady had something caught in her teeth and just couldn’t get it out. You don’t want to go after it when you’re on camera so there was a lot of facial Olympics happening there.
I have no idea what President Trump was saying, because I was fascinated, just waiting for Nancy to pop out whatever it was that she was working on!
Then the silly camera guy would go back to watching the speech, but now I wanted to know, did she get it out of her teeth???
There was the elegant Melania Trump. I swear she could wear a feed sack with class.
Of course, knowing that she arrived at the capital via another car was the distraction here, and wondering how she’s doing after the Stormy Daniels debacle…and while President Trump was speaking I had to google Stormy Daniels only to find that she had released this statement about her alleged affair with President Trump that said, “The fact of the matter is that each party to this alleged affair denied its existence in 2006, 2011, 2016, 2017 and now again in 2018,” she continued. “I am not denying the affair because I was paid ‘hush money’ as has been reported in overseas owned tabloids. I am denying this affair because it never happened.” So then I wondered how Jimmy Kimmel would handle that.
But now, back to the speech, yes, this really is how distracted I get.
I was touched with the families there that had lost children, your heart can only break for them.
I loved the story about the officer that adopted a crack addicted baby.
I especially loved it when President Trump pointed out our motto, “In God we Trust” it’s been a long time since anyone has pointed that out, and especially a president.
Overall, with all the distractions, when I did tune in to what was being said, I was impressed.
Of course, THEN I thought, “Wow he found himself a good speech writer, FINALLY!”
I have to admit when he started out with the sniffing, I gritted my teeth and thought, “Ack, I. Just. Can’t. Listen, To. That, For. An. Hour.”
Either it stopped or I got so distracted I didn’t notice it toward the end.
Of course, after the President’s speech, I was ready to listen to the Democratic response, from none other than, another Kennedy.
First I thought, “Is there anyone else in politics besides a Kennedy, Clinton or Bush?”
But I thought, okay, let’s listen to another Kennedy. I expected the Massachusetts accent, and I have to admit, I was disappointed. I mean come on. As someone from the midwest, we’re boring. We don’t have the southern drawl and we don’t have the New York sound, and we sure don’t talk like we’re from Fargo, so I wanted to hear a little Massachusetts. But nope. Sigh.
So I settled in.
The first thing I noticed was the car in the background.
Now come on.
Am I the only one that said, “No! Not a car! You’re a Kennedy, what are people going to associate that with?” Yep you got it. Uncle Teddy’s trip to Chappaquidick!
But I thought, pay attention.
So I started to listen.
But I couldn’t! The lip gloss was running off of Joe’s mouth. Then it seemed like it got worse. It was running off BOTH corners of his mouth! Was it going to actually start dripping?
SOMEONE PLEASE stop and wipe off the kids’ face!
Dean walked through and made a comment about the content of the speech, which I didn’t even hear, I was mesmerized by the drooling.
Then I remembered what Nancy Pelosi had said before the speech. She didn’t want her colleagues to disturb “drooling Trump” during his speech.
That’s all I could think about.
I laughed. I had to tell Dean about that as we watched.
Joe then said something about the “Founding Fathers and Mothers”, you know the sound a needle makes as it skids across a record, that’s what I heard. What??? Founding Mothers???
Then he went into Spanish, which sounded like he actually knew the language, and my first thought was, “Well, I have no idea what you just said, but I bet Jeb Bush does…”
I tried again to listen.
I did. I tried really, really hard.
But my eyes got in the way. I was watching a redhead, which I’m partial to, with lip gloss/drool on his face, looking all spiffy, while speaking Spanish, in front of a car, that reminded me of his uncle’s antics…it was just too much.
I gave up.
All I could think was this.
“Ask not what your country can drool for you, ask how you can drool in front of your country.”
And now I see a headline that says, GOP Train Crash.
Well, I expected that headline last night, but apparently there was an actual train crash today, which included folks from the GOP.
Never a dull moment in politics…off to follow that story now, but for my next speech, I think I need a blindfold.