Health and Fitness : Rethink the Holidays to Ease Stress and Build Memories

The holiday season often brings stress, whether we're juggling multiple commitments or coping with loneliness. In 2020 the holiday season brings the added stress of navigating COVID-19.

"Although we may not be facing the same stresses, we are facing new stresses as we decide how we'll be spending the holidays and how to keep in touch with family and friends. Some people may have increased feelings of loneliness, with the self-isolation that is happening," said Danielle Day, a human sciences specialist with Iowa State University Extension and Outreach.

Mental Health America is a community-based nonprofit dedicated to addressing the needs of those living with mental illness and promoting the overall mental health of all. Over 1.5 million people participated in the organization's online screening program from January through September 2020 and accessed immediate resources and support.

According to the organization's 2021 State of Mental Health in America report, screenings for anxiety and depression skyrocketed and over 8 in 10 people who completed an anxiety or depression screening reported moderate to severe symptoms. Over 178,000 people reported frequently thinking about suicide, with 37% reporting they had thought about suicide more than half of the month or nearly every day in September 2020. From April to September, of those who reported moderate to severe symptoms of anxiety or depression, 70% reported that one of the top three things contributing to their mental health concerns was loneliness or isolation.

"While we typically look at the holiday season as a time of joy and gatherings with friends and family, the 2020 holidays will be different as we follow guidance on gatherings and limit potential exposure to COVID-19," said Day, who specializes in family life issues.

"It's important to take care of our own mental health as we adjust our normal holiday traditions and routines. It's also important to remember those close to us who may be experiencing extreme feelings of loneliness or isolation and try to find ways to decrease those feelings," Day said.

Day offered some ways to adjust the holidays, ease some of the stress and anxiety, and build lasting memories with friends and family.

Rethink expectations

Many people have routines and traditions throughout the holidays. These can include various celebrations, baking special items, meaningful decorations, concerts, community events and large gatherings.

"While this year may be a little different, this also gives us time to think about the important pieces of those traditions and find ways to incorporate them into our lives. Remember, we are all experiencing these changes at the same time," Day said.

Consider individual expectations for the holiday season. What are ways to include family and friends who may be experiencing loneliness or isolation during this time? Can you incorporate some traditions on a more intimate scale? Be flexible.

Practice self-care

"The holidays are a time we show our love and kindness to one another. It should also be a time we show our love and kindness to ourselves," Day said.

What stress-relieving activities can you practice during this time to lower your stress and anxiety levels? Perhaps dive into a good book. Watch holiday movies with the family. Get crafty. Maintain holiday traditions with your family in your household. Take a break from technology. Get adequate rest. It's OK to take a break.

"Find what brings you joy and do that this holiday season. It's the best gift we can give ourselves and others," Day said.

Stay connected

"Even though we may not have large gatherings this year it is still important to stay connected with friends and family. This can help boost our own moods in addition to boosting happiness in those experiencing loneliness and isolation," Day said.

Be creative to stay connected with each other. Perhaps use videoconferencing to share a large family meal, play games or bake. Create care packages for others of their favorite items. Send cards and make phone calls to those far away. Staying connected even when apart will help everyone with feelings of loneliness during this time.

"If you have an older adult in your life with particular skills, perhaps enlist their help to make some homemade gifts. Having that sense of purpose can help someone struggling with their own mental health," Day said.

Create new traditions and memories

"We may not be able to partake in all our holiday traditions this year, but this is a perfect time to consider making a new tradition in your life or exploring other traditions from around the world," Day said.

Maybe make a new dish for the holidays or schedule a game night. Show gratitude and appreciation for one another and for each person's uniqueness. Remember that new traditions aren't about money spent, but rather the memories that come from the time spent together.

If you or someone you know is struggling with feelings of loneliness, anxiety, depression or suicidal thoughts throughout this time, there are resources to help 24/7/365.

* Iowa Concern Hotline, 800-447-1985

* National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, 800-273-8255 or text HOME to 741741

* Your Life Iowa, 855-581-811 or text 855-895-8398