Opinion : Re-inventing the domestic use of the wheel: The engineering most needed now

Can I mow the lawn, Dad?

Please!?!?!?!

Can I mow the lawn NOW?!?!?!?!

No, I was not dreaming.

Youngest Kid – like most of her older siblings in previous years – was indeed pleading for permission to cut the grass.

That’s because we have just returned our riding lawn mower from the shop. That now means that mowing = DRIVING. Before, it was just: WORK.

For any kid not yet possessing his or her driver’s license – and well, for most of them who do – driving is fun. Driving is desirable. Driving is something to do every day, every hour. Driving is cool, although I am under the impression that kids these days do not say "cool."

“Daddy let me drive,” sings Alan Jackson in a song that recalls his own childhood as well as words he has heard several times as a father.

Having access to a plenty of rural pathways throughout our life has meant that I have given each of our children the chance to drive our vehicles long before they were old enough to worry about studying Iowa DOT manuals in preparation for their permit.

(Knowing that the authorities are reading this column requires me to tell you that at all times I followed all state and local regulations, with due adherence to the proper safety procedures. And by “authorities” I am referring more to mothers than police officers.)

While they wait for the magical age of 14, when their nervous parents sit in the passenger seat noticing that the ditches seem much closer than ever, children are surprisingly content with anything that simulates the driving experience. Go-karts. Video games. And, as I have frequently re-discovered: Riding lawn mowers.

While our kids naturally loved the chance to drive at that age, they did not realize that I was doing that for selfish reasons; they did not know I was thinking ahead a few years to when their love of driving would make my life more convenient.

“I haven’t had to mow for years,” said another dad with a couple of under-age boys.

As I heard my daughter pleading for a chance to drive, it occurred to me both why the Cat in the Hat is so beloved and what America needs to do in terms of future technology.

That famous feline in the Dr. Seuss book is not beloved just because he can balance a fish (for a while) on a rake, or for his famous two Things. He is the world’s most-loved fictional cat because he showed children how to clean their room while DRIVING.

A whole new world of inventions awaits the creative thinker who can build a device that lets children drive while doing homework or dishes or even feeding the pets or livestock.

Most parents can recite with exhaustion the daily debates over exactly what chores remain undone and exactly whose job it is on that day to do them. But if every chore had its own vehicle, the only asking would come from the children under age 14 who seek another opportunity to “drive.”

I understand that Vinton-Shellsburg has several members of the Class of 2013 (and earlier years) who have chosen to enroll in engineering programs at state universities.

To all of these bright, young creators of new technology, I call on you to look for ways to implement driving into our daily routine.

Not only will you find a path to wealth and fame; you will also have a much easier time getting your children to put their socks in the washer.