advertiser content
advertiser content

It all started when the pants went into the laundry. It messed up my whole day. Now granted, I have other clothes to wear, but some don't have pockets. I NEED pockets.

This girl has a routine. Put my phone in my pocket, go to the door, put on my coat if it's warranted, put on my shoes, grab my keys, lock the door and go to the car. I'm at the age that if you mess with just one of those steps, I'm a goner. Well, it happened. I didn't have a pocket to put my phone in.

I grabbed my phone, juggled my camera, put on my coat and shoes, and about forgot to grab my keys. I suppose there's a part of my brain that has been trained that if, and only if I have my keys aka something in my hand, then I can walk out the door. I was seconds away from locking myself out.

Probably there are too many things that I do on autopilot. I stepped back into the house grabbed the keys and paused to do a checklist.

Phone, check.

Keys, check.

Camera, check.

Coat, check.

Oh, I might as well tell you that the last time I was tripped up, well..I got to the door and went to slip my phone into my pocket, but my pocket was gone. What??? "These are my pocket pants," I thought to myself. I looked down and yep, it was the right pants, but the seams were outside. I retreated, turned the pants right side out and the day went smoothly after that.

Hey, a girl can only take care of a certain number of details, and keys and clothing are on the bottom of the list apparebtly. So if you see me dressed, just be glad. It might be downhill from here.

So anyway, last night I got home from my meeting in my pocketless pants. The routine for leaving the car is much like my "leaving the house routine." I call this the "leaving the car routine." I grab the phone, put it in my pocket, grab anything else, then my keys. I open the door, lock the door and go into the house.

There was no pocket. So I'm in my car trying to figure out how to juggle all the things that I needed to take into the house. I loaded up, got out of the car grabbed a few more things, and shut the door. Then I realized that my lights were on the auto shut-off mode. I unlocked the door, turned off the lights, dropped my water bottle, locked the door, shut the door, picked up the water bottle, and went into the house.

You know how it is when you walk in, you drop everything then put it away. I did. Then I sat down at the computer, but something wasn't right.

Computer, check.

Papers for a story, check.


Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?

Not by the door, not in the coat, not in the refrigerator (stop laughing) not on the counter, not in the bedroom. I was sure that I brought it in.

So I got on the computer to find my phone. I knew that I had made a late-night stop and I was sure that I had my phone with me when I left...not that I'm scatterbrained or anything, so I wouldn't actually bet money on that. I found my phone. The computer said it was in the yard.

At this point I think it was about 12:30 a.m. Do I put my coat on over my jammies, and make a run for it? What if I fall and break a leg? Not that I ever have, but I wouldn't have a phone to call for help. But what if it's in the yard and someone finds it? I decided quickly that there was too much info on my phone case and phone, so I put the coat on over my jammies and went outside, grabbing my keys. I don't see the phone on the ground...

I found it safely locked in the car.

I've reached the age that I don't particularly care if the neighbors see me with my coat on over my jammies. I did note that if I did break a leg their lights were still on.

Now you know the next time that my computer says that the phone is in the yard, I'll know that it's probably in the car. But you know that I'll do this again. Stay tuned, or keep your eyes peeled for the crazy lady in her jammies at midnight wandering to her car!

So the moral of the story, wear enough pockets and don't mess up the routine. Oh and if you can't find your pockets, you'll know your pants are inside out...


Submit a Comment

Please refresh the page to leave Comment.

Still seeing this message? Press Ctrl + F5 to do a "Hard Refresh".

advertiser content advertiser content advertiser content
advertiser content